“It’s gotten better but I can’t make a blanket statement that it doesn’t happen anymore,” he said. “There are always going to be shades of homophobia — sometimes internalized homophobia that I’ve encountered from other gay people in the industry. They might feel that [I am] ‘too gay.’”
Oh, Adam. I feel you. Actually, Lurkie was the one who kind of inspired this post when he wrote:
"Why do you make such a fuss? Being gay is not a personality. Do you really have to dress like that? Do you have to act like that? I know you are desperate to draw attention to yourself, but it is embarrassing to us respectable gays.”
There is always this push form some gay men to get other gay men to try and 'tame' the gayness. What the fuck is that all about? Gay men come (hehe) in all sizes, ages, colors and levels of flame. Not all men are Adam Lambert. And not all gay men are Gus Kenworthy. And some are in the middle. There's no GayMeter (c) to measure how gay somebody can -or should- be.
The Gaystapo -I'm looking at you, homocons- have decided that gay men should all wear khakis and button-down blue shirts and penny loafers and have Best Cuts haircuts ordered using voices without a trace of a lisp or intonation. Do they know what Camp is? Do they know that sometimes the 'gay' voice will come out? That no matter how closeted, one day there'll be a 'my boyfriend' in the middle of a conversation? That making sure you're never 'gay' only makes you.. gayer? I know some very straight men who camp it up to high heavens and they've never sucked dick. Or felt the need to do it.
For years, there's been a push from some gay men to appear 'normal', to not be 'too much', to stop the 'she' when talking about another gay men. Their idea of comfort is conforming to some idea they have of the gay man that's accepted by society at large. And they don't take into account that just as not every straight person is Brad Pitt or George Clooney, not every gay man is Frank Ocean. There's some Sam Smiths thrown in for good measure, along with some Elton Johns.
So when Adam says that some people considered him 'too gay' I absolutely believe him. I know, I know, "I'm not gay, I'm a man who happens to be gay", blah, blah, blah. Well, I've got news for you: Yes, you are a man who just happens to be gay, but your taste for dick is what makes you gay and there's nothing wrong with that. That does not define you, but that's what sets you apart.
Being gay is not our defining trait, but it IS a trait we don't share with the rest of the heterosexual world (bisexual and pansexual men are on our corner, by the way). We have been stigmatized, hospitalized and castrated in the name of 'normalcy' and if that does not define you, then I don't know what would.
So there. I'll leave you now with Adam Lambert, who is just as gay as he wants to be in these videos. And that does not make him any less hot.