One, Two, Three, Peter, Paul and Henry...





We have thought about a threesome.

I like to think we're pretty open. After being in this together and accepting the joys and limitations of our relationship, I don't think there's much we don't know about each other. I think we are adventurous when it comes to sex and I don't believe there's any kind of toxic possessiveness clouding the idea of us being 'together'.

I also think it's not fair to put all our hopes, dreams and desires on the ONE person we consider OURS. Nobody can live up to those expectations. The idea of the soulmate is a very tempting one but also, from my point of view, a very dangerous one. We are expecting that one person will forever be the source of all the things we need and want. And that's not fair with them. Or us.

I've read and heard about monogamy  and about how it has been imbued in society by religion and social norms (not that I follow religion or social norms, mind you). But I think hat heteronormativity is overreaching and it has permeated relationships at all levels, even queer and alternative kind of relationships.

I think people can be in love and not be monogamous and be monogamous and not in love. And I'm not alone. That push for serial monogamy can be tricky and lead to some sort of romantic mirage that makes us put all this weight into a notion that may not be the most ideal for a relationship that seems so essential to so many people.

So let's keep thinking about that threesome. It may be fun. It may be a fail. But keeping us open to sharing the pleasure of us being together may be the clue to enjoy the pleasure we share.

xoxo

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