I have decided that crushing hardcore is just not worth the effort anymore. I find it somehow unnecessary and a waste of energy. Or is it? I learned a long time ago (whoa! when I was an undergrad) that crushing only makes the object of your affection more unattainable. We invent qualities and add interesting touches to the man who we think embodies our most hidden desires. But does he? Can he stand the scrutiny of daylight? The post-orgasmic lull? The morning after? Most probably not.
Because we crush hardcore on what WE think he has. On who WE think he is. Not on HIM. But still we keep doing it.
Take my latest crushes: a guy in my class and Marc Broussard. I crush hardcore on him. Because he's got the body (a man's body, not a boy's. And those wide shoulders and chest...), the face (still young, yet with a hint of experience), the voice (deep, rumbling, it makes my heart beat faster). Because he's got the feeling, the attitude, the smile. Because he's unattainable. Because I know I cannot have him. Because he's got that christian-y vibe I despise in most people. Isn't that twisted? Just a little?