So... then.





Just by watching the voraciously happy exchange of boyfriends among friends I cannot but stop and wonder about my reticence as of late to get involved emotionally with anyone. I do keep my friends and feel close to them and all that, but I have refrained to let any of them to get 'too close'. And I have been known from time to time to let 'someone in'. But not anymore. What is going on?
I think I am at a crossroads in my relationship right now. With him I sometimes feel like a very close roommate, like a very dear friend of a very dear friend who sometimes have a quasi-intimate encounter and go back to the comfortable routine of a couple who has been together for twenty years (but we have been together only for five). But no sex. I cannot bring myself to 'do' it.
Is that all that there is to it? Familiarity breeds contempt, the saying goes. And I am afraid that one day I will let someone step in from the friend realm and really take a hold of my feelings. Because I don't feel I'm feeling much. Emotionally, I feel drained and not in a bad way. I just feel like there may be something lacking but I cannot really put my finger on it.
Oh, well. I'll think about that some other day. Now I'll just go and look for some chocolate to eat. Hmmm.... chocolate...

Comments

  1. Chocolate!!!! eso y el sexo son las unicas cosas en las que pido mas jejejejeje
    La verdad, hasta hace poco tenía a alguien y me pide ser solo amigos, pero en mis amigos confio, en el no puedo confiar mas...
    creo que la amistad puede llegar a estar por encima de los romances...
    besitos desde mi lejana galaxia

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