Go back in time

Show more

Bomba Estéreo - Amar Así (Official Video)

Sometimes I wonder about the restrictive stiffness of 'the closet'. As someone who has never been 'in' the closet, the idea has baffled me for years. I try to understand the reasons why (family, work, religion, convenience, etc) but still, I believe the toll it takes on the person should be absolutely staggering. Cannot imagine it.

I recently learned through my ManFriend (please, I haven't had a boyfriend since I'm 14!) of one acquaintance of his who is apparently in the closet, yet does Skype sessions with guys he meets online. I did a double take. How is that possible? It seems to contradict the basic tenant of the closet: secrecy.

I imagine that the closet requires a double dose of cognitive dissonance: you need to deny some of your wants most of the time while convincing yourself that openly accepting your needs means you're not out. After all, thousands of republican politicians demonstrate that dissonance every single day. Or maybe the closet is just another manifestation of how you live your life? Can you be partially closeted? Out to some people? Closeted-ish? Because I think there are some closets that are partially open, or open to some people. Like, circumstantial outing?

As I told you, the closet baffles me. Not because the person is closeted, but because the amount of energy and care that should be put into it should be staggering. But some people live with it all their lives. For some, the closet IS their life. So I look at life in the closet both as a curiosity but also as a social manifestation of the lengths we go to live our lives including all the facets it has. Do I judge that acquaintance of my ManFriend? I don't think I do. Do I look at him with curiosity? You bet.

At the end, we will never be able to really gain insight into someone else's life and we will never totally understand their motivations. I think not even they understand their motivations. But from my point of view, if they are not harming anybody (I'm looking at you, closeted republicans!) The Closeted should be left alone. After all, it's their life. And we are all for sure too busy with our own lives to try and understand theirs.





Popular Posts

En otra lengua

  • UN VERANO TENEBROSO - ¿Que pasó? ¿Se me esfumó el buen rollismo de la última entrada? ¿Estoy "acojonao" por los rebrotes víricos, deprimido por mi paupérrimo estado sentimental...
    3 days ago
  • La evolución de las canas - Siempre he tenido amigos que me llevan un buen trecho en edad y otros vicios. Tener amigos que nos aventajan en unas décadas proporciona anticuerpos co...
    3 days ago
  • ¡No me gusta...! - No me gusta esta pandemia, llena de miedos, de ansiedad, de desinformación, de *fakes, *de falsos profetas de las soluciones y de los oscuros augurios. ...
    6 days ago
  • Aquí no venden la leche en bolsa - No asistí a una universidad pública. Mirando atrás, no sé qué me previno tanto de hacerlo. Más allá del paradigma pequeñoburgués que una educación pueb...
    4 weeks ago
  • - En los días que se han convertido en años, en tiempo que transcurre y sin entenderme a mi mismo en mis angustias, en mis silencios, en mis ruidos que no c...
    6 months ago

Restricted to Adults

Restricted to Adults
Under 18? Beat it. Now.