look back

"Looks fade away but personality is forever".

I think that there's not a group that is as rabidly ageist as gay men. In this brave new world where you can basically order sex with the push of an app, that is more obvious than ever. In the olden days (trust me, that would be 2009, when Grindr made its appearance) you would have to go to a gay bar/bookstore/coffee shop and actually talk to another man in order to get him to bed. Or you would do a Personal ad (yep, those were a thing) a la Desperately Seeking Susan. And the blatant segregation of the aged was to be done face to face, after some drinks or some perfunctory conversation. But there WAS a face to face phase.

I have never been able to understand that obsession with age. I have never actively pursued men who are younger than myself, so I have never found myself on the other side of the fence. I have always tended to date and bed men my age or older. I have sometimes had relationships with men younger than me but those have been few and in between.

I found older men more interesting, more knowledgeable and better in bed than younger men. Younger men do sometimes bring things like a different worldview and some freshness to a relationship (along with tumescence for DAYS) but tend to be a little vacuous and oftentimes focus narrowly on issues that older men see in different ways due to experience. Oh, when in bed, younger men can be good, I'm not saying that younger men are bad in bed. But what younger men have in stamina and subjective beauty, older men have in savoir faire and technique. Sex appeal does not die once we turn twenty five, right?

Older men sometimes do have more baggage, granted. It comes with the territory. But I consider that a byproduct of experience. I think I can deal with that. I’ve got some too and can relate. We all know that the gap between older and younger gets shorter and closer every day. We are all going to be ‘old’ one day, right? So I guess I wanna be like the older men in the video, who reminisce and joke about their (hot, to be honest) younger selves and know who they were then and there and don’t feel any need to be that man again. Or date him.

XoXo