There is one major difference between the novel and Luca Guadagnino’s film though. In the book, Oliver eats the… um… “stuffed” peach after Elio is finished pleasuring himself with it. “Oliver says, ‘I want every part you,’” Aciman recounts for us. “‘If you die, I want part of you to stay with me in my system.’” However, in the film, Oliver simply makes a gesture to eat the fruit before Elio stops him and begins crying. “That is good enough for cinema,” Aciman says. “We don’t need to see more.”
By André-Naquian Wheeler

And I don't agree. We DO need to see more. Don't get me wrong. I thoroughly enjoyed the Call Me By Your Name. I loved the acting, the setting, the music. Still, I find mainstream gay themed movies to be sanitized to please a wider audience. Call Me By Your Name is a beautiful movie, well acted and well shot. Have you seen it? But I left the theater wanting a little bit more. Maybe Miz Cracker put it more concisely:

The straightness is everywhere once you clear the lust from your eyes. The book was penned by a straight author who says that he has never had a gay relationship in his life, and it tells the story of two apparently heteroflexible but largely hetero-leaning men who seem to experiment with same-sex sex only furtively in their lives. The film is even straighter. Its leading lovers are played by straight actors who have been winking and giggling on the press circuit about having to pretend to (sort of) fuck. Indeed, all “gay” sex takes place off screen—only boy-girl or boy-fruit sex happens within the frame.

And I agree! Really. We get so blinded by the chance to see ourselves on the big screen that we'll take whatever is thrown our way, even if it's sanitized for a wider audience. We did it with Brokeback Mountain. We did it with Moonlight. We did it with CMBYN. I keep wondering when we will get to see a movie like Stranger By the Lake or maybe another Shortbus. Or one like Weekend or In God's Country that have given us other kind of stories .

But those movies are sometimes considered NC17. They showed Shortbus with a lot of handwringing. And Stranger by the Lake is a porn tube staple, as you can see. Oh, we have seen some movies and TV series that have included some realistic sex scenes, but I want a whole movie that talks about my experience as a gay man being in a relationship and having sex. Straight people get that every single day. Why can't I?


p.s. oh, here:


  1. I totally agree. And I loved Shortbus.

    1. Absolutely. That first scene with the guy jerking off? Fantastic.

  2. Straight washing is a problem that we have to find a solution to. And hopefully the answer comes sooner rather than later. Maybe with the proliferation of gay-themed releases we can move the needle in that direction. The more the straight world sees that queer people are just like them, with hopes and fears and dreams, society will loosen up and accept more realistic portrayals on screen.

    And just possibly Mayor Pete could move that needle. He’s showing that a gay man has more on his mind than just sex. He’s intelligent, articulate and compassionate. Let’s hope he can help change minds in this fucked up country.

    Oh, and you had to post that video and yesterday’s post while you’re out of town? You’re one devious bastard. 😈

    XOXO 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

  3. "Boy-fruit sex," LOL. They're filming a sequel to this movie apparently. Maybe you'll get your wish then? Doubt it though.

    1. Doubt it too. And I don’t know if it would live up to the hype... Armie is dreamy tho.

  4. We did need to see more, because the story is far more touching and personal and achingly sad than what they did to the scene on film.

    1. Yes! The book is -of course- much more nuanced, sensual...

  5. I had to run home after seeing Moonlight and go to the Urban Dictionary to find out what "running trap" and a few other terms meant. I had to watch In God's Country three times because of the accents (that's my story and I'm sticking with it). I liked Shortbus.

    I agree we need to see more, but subject and content are more important. My favorite gay movie is a Scandinavian film called "Patrik".

    1. Ha ha. Of course you’re sticking with it. I feel you.
      And Patrik? Gotta find it. 🤓


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