Looking?
So what will become of hooking up in the time of COVID-19? That was the question I was asking my friend Bill just the other day. We were cackling after he sent me a meme going around right now that hookup apps have been warning their users about the pandemic. But it seems that it is true that both Grindr and Scruff actually sent an alert to its users about it. And they may not be wrong on doing that. Seriously. I would be worried.
It's even on New York Magazine:
What you don’t know is that ten days ago, your friend’s father was a guest of his business partner at the University Club, where he caught the novel coronavirus from the wife of a cryptocurrency speculator. Three days after that, he coughed into his hand before opening the door of his apartment to welcome his son home. The saliva of COVID-19 patients can harbor half a trillion virus particles per teaspoon, and a cough aerosolizes it into a diffuse mist. As your friend walked through the door he took a breath and 32,456 virus particles settled onto the lining of his mouth and throat.
Viruses have been multiplying inside his body ever since. And as he talks, the passage of his breath over the moist lining of his upper throat creates tiny droplets of virus-laden mucus that waft invisibly into the air over your table. Some settle on the as-yet-uneaten food on your plate, some drift onto your fingers, others are drawn into your nasal sinus or settle into your throat. By the time you extend your hand to shake good-bye, your body is carrying 43,654 virus particles. By the time you’re done shaking hands, that number is up to 312,405.
JEFFWISE
I think that no hookup is worth risking my safety. No man, no matter how crazy sexy cool, is worth braking my social distancing. No man, no matter how this sheltering in place is fucking up my libido is worth feeling like shit for weeks, probably wrecking my lungs and pancreas and who knows what else. How do I know I don'e have some fucked up underlying condition? I totally understand why my friend would have some fucked up PTSD-like reaction to this pandemic.
What about sex? Is it safe during COVID-19? Take a look at the guidance from @nycHealthy New York City Department of Health. From https://t.co/H5HFCULJN9 pic.twitter.com/PXdtzXtVyZ— Michael B. Clark (they/them) (@HealthLGBTQ) March 21, 2020
Having sex with someone you don't really know may be hot but it is NOT social distancing. He may be sliding in your DM's (and your sheets) but that's not sheltering in place. Even if you don't kiss him, doggie style is not really conductive to those six feet of distance that you need to be on the safe side. So, I guess I'm gonna keep it within the quarantine. It's gonna be me, myself and I for the time being. No nookie is worth my moxie.
XOXO
P.S.
For u Wankers who can’t understand how serious this is here’s an example pic.twitter.com/ya8cTiqOqR— ΔVΔŦΔŘ (@AvatarAkyiaXXX) March 31, 2020
And this is why Pornhub has made its premium content free right now. As you have said, and Maddie concurs, a roll in the hay ain’t worth it. He may be hot and you’re wound tight, but literally your life depends on restraint.
ReplyDeleteNow, if you’ll excuse me...
XOXO 👨❤️💋👨
PornHub has stayed ahead of the curve in many of these calamities. Remember when they went all out for the bees and the environment? Who the fuck knew?
DeleteXOXO
I can't have sex with anyone, because all of us are in quarantine. What's safer than that?
ReplyDeleteI know! Nothing like safe love in the times of plague. But you just know that there's some idiots squirreling around for dick...
DeleteXOXO
Lockdown and self-isolation mean just that, but, hey, you wanna risk getting sick for a hook-up?
ReplyDeleteJerk your chicken instead.
This is the time that people who are poly or have a partner are going to really appreciate that. Even if it's just for the company. I wonder if this is gonna mean a tons of babies -or divorces- in nine months.
DeleteXOXO
Tons of babies and tons of divorces.
DeleteIt seems pretty obvious, doesn't it? That video is hilarious!
ReplyDeleteIt does! But I wonder if it's downed on people.
DeleteAnd that video made me cackle for hours. It's quite accurate. LOL
XOXO
If Grindr and Scruff, et al, were being smart they'd be offering free sex chats or something of that nature. There's no denying men have the need to get off - but, boys, that's what hands and hollowed out melons are for. :-) Even couples must quarantine/isolate should one have been out in public for anything. That puts nookie into the no-no category for them too. But delivery is still available: Get a FleshJack. xoxo
ReplyDeleteYAAAASSSSSS Pat....thank god for my flesh jack!!!!!!!!!
DeleteLOL hands and hollowed melons, huh?
DeleteI thought it was warm apple pies... but what do I know? And of course delivery is still available! Now, who's got a good code for Adam & Eve?
XOXO
I saw guys still looking for hookups, umm yeah good luck with that. Just proves it's an addiction to some men and also that they don't really take their health seriously.
ReplyDeleteIdiots! I knew it!
DeleteYou are right. All that says it's that they're not very smart. Just horny. And reckless. And who would want that?
XOXO
I would agree with everybody here, and I have a high libido so this will be new to me. I have several online friends and insta guys I know for some cyber fun, and of course the Lad, to relieve pressure so to speak. And the other day had a nice cam session with a guy from Ireland...oh my lord his accent!!!!!!! twice my "straight" neighbor has been in, only because I know either of us has not been around people yet. Not sexual, nibbles, drinks conversation and watch a movie. Last week we watched a movie called District, a gay themed movie. Interesting watching that with a straight earth loving guy!!!!!!!! It's odd, though, because I pick up on a sexual tension in the room when he's here, so I may have to limit his visits. But these random hooks ups???? Need to stop. Just jack off 6 times a day if you need to.
ReplyDeleteOhhh Cyber is going to become really, really popular.
DeleteAnd you'll have to tell us about the Irish lad. Yum accents! And a straight pal who drops by to watch gay movies? Of course there's gonna be some tension. Tsk, Tsk Maddie.
LOL @ jacking off six times a day.
XOXO
Now, Maddie, perhaps it's time to introduce that straight neighbor to the joys of mutual masturbation....
DeleteYou know what? Wouldn’t it be better to use all that sexual tension and jerk off six feet apart? While intensely looking at each other? Hmmmm?
DeleteXoXo
Ok...you two are not helping....but after a joint and drink, I sense he'd be open for that?????? Just a six sense. And Sixpenses's suggestion is hot. The Lad and I do that sometimes when he is here...from across the room, just watching each other go to town stroking.
DeleteOhhh yes! That neighbor should come over STAT. Get the pot ready! And may we please have a video of the both of you while..err.. social distancing? Just to make sure the six-feet distance is enforced? For science? And with good lighting so we can appreciate the distancing?
DeleteKthnxbi.
XoXo
It's one of the reasons they shut down the bars, a couple cocktails and we're invincible. Stay home, stay smart, stay safe, and, as has already been mentioned, buy a flesh jack if necessary.
ReplyDeleteTure.
DeleteTaking drinking in bars out of the equation probably helped. Still, it seems that people are buying more alcohol to go, so there's that. Toys (and cyber sex, apparently) are the way to go.
XOXO
We can do this!! Everyone will have tons of fun when this is all over. Hang in there, people. The problem I am having is that I keep getting sexually harassed by myself while working from home. Myself keeps telling me to look at these videos. I might have to talk to HR.
ReplyDeleteYes, of course we can!
DeleteLOL oh, Mr. Shife, sorry about Yourself! I would check the HR booklet about 'distractions at work'.
XOXO