On being green

So I've decided to talk about my plants. During this sheltering in place I've realized that I actually have quite the collection. Who knew I was one of those caring people? I have surprised myself and it’s all because I'm following Maddie’s example, of course. Her posts about little birds and botanical gardens finally got to my subconscious.

I have apparently slowly but surely accumulated quite a collection of little plants during my years living in Chicago and I think I like the green. I don't remember having had so many plants before. maybe a terrarium or two, but that was about it. Nothing serious, just something that required minimal care and brought the green inside during the cold months.

I think I like the idea of having plants. I guess it all started because one of my girls got two plants in some kind of crazy Suzy Homemaker bout of madness and then I was left to care for them because I basically could not let them just die. Maybe I think of them as my pets. Mind you, I really don't like pets. I don't have dogs or cats but apparently I do have plants.

I don't really care about having pets, btw. I'm not what you would call a 'pet person'. I have taken care of other people's pets -even for long periods of time- and my family had pets when I was a kid, but I have never felt the urge to go and rescue a doggie or kitty. And I say rescue because I would NEVER buy from puppy farms. They are absolutely horrible.

I do have some experience with -other people's- pets and they're ok, but I never quite figured out that I actually liked plants. I've realized I have accumulated these plants I have now almost by inertia. You see, I usually see a poor plant dying at the AsIs in let's say, Ikea and I usually buy it. I just can't with people who think that pets and plants are just disposable things.

I wonder, why the fuck would someone buy a pet or a plant and then just let it die? I cannot fathom it. It's that simple. But I've realized that some people are very spur-of the moment buyers and don't give a fuck about anything else besides themselves. I'm judging those idiots. Because I can. How dare they?

So back to the plants. I'm really not an expert, but for those of you who actually know about plants, you'll probably realize that they are mostly easy to care for, practically indestructible plants. And they have to be like that, because I think that even though I will not totally neglect them, I also refuse to be ruled by them.

I guess it's a character flaw. Most of the plants I have (like those air plants I keep in glass containers) were basically gifts that kept giving. I think I've bought three of those. But I really like them. They need to be misted twice a week and submerged about once a month, but I think they're super cool. They probably connect me with some atavistic need I have to live in the tropics.

As for the orchids, Some of those were rescued from Ikea. One or two were a gift. And they all stayed. I think orchids are super pretty but finicky. Like a bad boyfriend who's got you dickmatized. I still like them. I've have them adapt to my lifestyle and now they live in a corner of my living room.

I like orchids even though they apparently are notoriously temperamental and won't flower when you want them to, but I don't care. I like them without flowers, with their little air roots and big green leaves. I also think I have a pineapple plant and some succulents. And some bromeliads, I think. Your run-of-the-mill indoor plants.

I have realized I have plants not because they give me flowers, like most people do. I have them because they're alive and I cannot let them die.  Does that make sense? Maybe my one friend is right and I'm just weird.

XOXO