Oh, T.J.

(c)AndyLyons

On Monday, I had no idea who T.J. Osbourne was. Really. Absolutely no idea. Today he's everywhere, and in everybody's feed (Hi, Bob), after coming out in a Time magazine interview. And of course I have some thoughts: one, he could talk to me for days and I would NOT get tired of that voice *swoon*. No way, no ma'am. Two, he could hit it. Any day. Any way. It's like  he is the trifecta of yes-please: long, tall, charming TJ. He's not impossibly handsome, I'm sure some gay men would think he's almost average.  But that makes him attractive in my book. Well, that and that voice.

© Kristine Potter for TIME: TJ Osborne

I have never been a country music fan (I know the most basic trifecta: Patsy Cline, Johnny Cash, Dolly Parton) so I never know what is going on in the musical universe where Country artists live. That is, until whatever is going on there hits the news and then my timeline is full of country news (like when Morgan Wallen -I know, I had no idea who he was, either- went on a profanity-laden racist rant and they banned his racist ass from radio). So that's why the news of T.J. being gay has been a quite a nice surprise.

It's indeed kind of surprising, this coming out, not because he's a gay musician, but because he's a COUNTRY music artist coming out. I think that Country music is one of the most conservative music genres there is. Yeah, even more than Hip-hop or Rap. Like rock, country is very white, very middle America/blue collar, very gendered, and very homophobic but in the case of country it is also very... boring? The themes are kind of trite and foreign to me and the stilted portrayal of gender roles and lifestyle they promote leaves me cold. Not to mention that there's really not a lot of bass involved in it (unless you can square dance). So it's kind of a no for me. I'm all about that bass. Modern day country is like twangy, watered down rock and roll or like spiced down Blues. No, thanks. 

But I do think that when somebody comes out, it's kind of worth noting it. Especially if it's unprovoked (unless T.J. sent a dick pic to the wrong asshole, natch) and a breath of fresh air. You know, representation and all that. Especially in a music genre not known for its acceptance of LGBTQ people. Also, it was quite interesting to listen to him in that Ellen interview talking about how weird it was for him to talk publicly about being gay, given that his family and inner circle seemed to have been informed of his liking guys. It's the burden of the closeted, not-obviously-gay gay man: coming out. I've never have had to come out to anybody or change pronouns when talking about my date or lie blatlanty or by omission about my unwavering taste for tall men with nice dicks and big hands. It's something that only those men who stand behind the fence of 'normalcy' have got to go through while we wave rainbow flags in front of them.

That being said, I also think that coming out is a very personal thing. Even though the closet is a poisonous, lonely place, I kind of understand why some men stay in it. Some gay  men come out to themselves and others comfortably when they're sixteen, going on seventeen. Some gay men are in their sixties (and seventies!) and have never come out to their family or friends or coworkers. I think it's a choice, of course. And nobody should be outed unless they are Lindsey Graham because everybody should come out when they believe they are ready. I, meanwhile, will keep going about with my very gay life, wearing my very gender neutral clothes, my bleached (slate gray this week) hair and my rainbow flag pin. I'll always promote LGBTQ artists and Drag performers and will talk about the injustices Trans women suffer. I'll always have naked men with their dicks hanging out on this blog. I'll be gay for the all the closet cases that cannot be gay (yet) themselves. Bless their lonely, afraid hearts. And if one day they come out, I'll make sure I post about them, too. 

So welcome to the club, T.J. hope your career keeps growing. I, for one, went and looked for his music right away, so there's that. Also, if anyone has his phone number, please send it my way. I have questions about square dancing that I think he could answer with a demonstration. I'm very hands on, you see ...

XOXO