Take a number

Oh, nothing like getting another perspective in what concerns 'attractiveness'. Especially when the variables of gender, age and culture serve as a buffer. In this video, two Korean girls are shown some Western men who are obviously attractive but share one veri salient quality: they are all what we consider middle aged. You see, some gay men seem quite fond of a very precise kind of beauty: one that's mildly pneumatic, extremely cultivated and above all, young. Men who have hit the Because apparently, for some gay men being desirable means being extremely fit and above all, young. Not Death in Venice young, mind you, but young. 

So watching this video I discovered that deep down, I'm a Korean girl. You see, I like that 'Flower Middle Age' they are talking about. For me, men who are above thirty and have some wear and tear are just fine. Oh, I can appreciate a man, let's see, in his late twenties and all the possibilities he could bring, of course. I'm not blind. But the thing is that I seem to get more excited at the sight of a body that has had some wear and tear (that shows) doing perfectly dirty things than at the idea of a gloriously pneumatic and unblemished body being a stick in the mud (in Maddie's very correct appraisal). So these girls are shown several men who are far from being 'common'. They are not your garden variety dad-next-door (but they could). They are models and personalities well known for their sartorial decisions and style. Just to show how not common these men are, they start with George Clooney.  And the girls freak out a little when they learn he's in his late fifties (that shows how young they are). I give them credit, though, because they like the way his beard grows. Same.

KevinMcDermott

Then they see Eric Rutherford. And honey, I have to say I'd also fold his socks and much, much more. One of them says she hopes her husband ages like that. And I will have to agree. Damn. I've seen Eric before online, come to think of it. He does not go unnoticed.

Urbantalents

Then it's on to  Philippe Dumas. And they marvel at his luxuriant beard. Again, will not blame the girls. Who could?  BTW, this is how many men over fifty I know look like and I think it's just fine. Yes, we lose definition as we age. Yes, the six pack may not be there. So what? Oh, when I'm writing on his blog, this is how I picture Lurkie (hi, Lurkie!). Only much grumpier.  

They move on Ron Jack Foley and they talk about how handsome he is. And here’s my disclaimer: I would have to say, if lust were to have a face and a body, dear Ron would be it. Damn. The hair. The charm. The beard. He just LOOKS solid. Yeah, I know he probably has a strict workout regime, but why wouldn't he? I know Dave rides his bike for miles to stay fit and many men over forty I know watch their diets and make sure they stay active. So a model would do all that by default. But Oh LaLa.  Mr. Foley, I'd climb you like a tree. Some people like climbing walls. I'd rather climb him. These girls are on to something, I'm telling you. 

SLAY

Then it's on to Irvin Randle, who usually looks super sharp and super stylish when dressed. Of course I went and found the photo in which he had minimum clothing. I'm here to objectify men. And the girls make an observation I have not thought about often: apparently a beard is very becoming when a man is older. They're the swagger of middle age. Who knew? I know several men over fifty and the rather be clean shaved. Maybe the beard is not a bad idea? 

Adonismale

There comes a moment when they're looking at Anthony's IG where they stop and stare. They're speechless because he's in a photo being very friendly with another man. It was super cute! One thing I have to say, though: Anthony Varrecchia is Daddy and nobody can deny that fact of life. One, because I'd fight you, and two, because obviously. And yes, chest hair can be that white. And not only chest hair. Many men are very serious about going gray.

One of the things that called my attention was how Kim Chil-Doo would become a model after turning sixty. You see? There's third acts everywhere. For everybody. Also, there's no such thing as age-restricted clothes, either. Not all men over fifty do have to spend their days looking like they're ready for the golf course. One can be stylish AND middle aged.  

There's this idea among gay men (and people in general) that life ends once we are not 'young' anymore. We are not seen as vital and apparently we stop thinking about sex. But what is young? Young as the girls in the video? They seem pretty comfortable with the men they see and are ready to look at the salient, 'different' qualities they offer. They even make plans to become some of the 'cool elders'. Is it just cultural? In America, we tend to find youth desirable and mandatory in order to appear attractive or sexually desirable. Once we pass a certain threshold we become all but invisible. Well, if we are not models or actors, natch. Have you noticed that? I don't know if American girls (or gay men) would be as objective and as clear minded as these girls in the video.

They seem pretty stunned by something we repeat often but don't really believe: age is just a number. As if discovering something new. But I've known that for a long time. I'm waiting for the rest of the world to catch up.

XOXO