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Oh, Real Friends...?



This is a question that some people may ask themselves. Some do it often. And you'd have to wonder why. For example, I recently met Mads face to face for the first time, and between us and the internet, it felt like we had been friends for YEARS. Our meeting had that easygoing, fun, warm complicity that you find with some of your longtime friends. It may have been because we bare so much of our souls online that the only thing needed was the spark of the face-to-face meeting to inspire a KiKi, but I think it's because Mads is such a cool human being that the whole thing went so well. It felt like friendship.

On the topic of friends, I recently learned that one of my exes (and one of my best friends!) and his husband may be leaving the country. I am kinda devastated. He's really one of the few people I trust with many, many things and one of my most fervent cheerleaders. If he moves to Asia, I'm going to be gutted.

Same with Huntley (who is also an ex, I think you see a pattern here). He's one of my closest friends, even though we have not seen each other in years. I also have friends living in other countries (Hey, @merlinpurpura) and friends that I only see once or twice every so many years. And yet every time we talk to each other, we catch up exactly where we left.  What these people all share is that instant kinship, that long-lasting warmth that stays with you even when you're not close to them. Friendship. 

It’s priceless. Especially in times like these. 

XOXO

P.S. I was not gonna come back online until after January 10, but decided some levity was needed…
We need to make the world we want. 

Comments

  1. Big says,
    The folks who you see or talk to after months or years and pick up right where you left off: Those are true friendships, for sure. Another way to nkow true friendship is to need a favor. Something big, and they come through for you.
    But, of course, you hit it off with Mads; he's the definition of a great person: KInd, good, compassionate, giving. And, though we have not met IRL, I can tell you are, too!
    XOXO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree!
      It's like time does not pass...
      And Mads is awesome.
      Awwww thanks, Big! I think you're awesome, too.

      XOXO

      Delete
  2. That's a very astute video! And yes, it's very hard when our close friends move to another city or country, but such is the mobile society we live in today.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That video hits the nail on the head.
      And you have no idea how many friends have up and moved two thousand miles away and even to another part of the world! Crazy.

      XOXO

      Delete
  3. You may find this odd, but I treat everyone as if he's a real friend and sometimes feel bad when they move on to other temporary friends.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, that's a philosophy that more people should subscribe to...
      I have tons of acquaintances, though. Comes with the territory. But I also have a group of very good friends...

      XOXO

      Delete
  4. Anonymous1/06/2025

    HuntleyBiGuy:
    I think true friendships are very rare. There are very few people that I can be open about most things, like you, babe. A lot of that has to do with me being an introvert. We may even keep things from family that we share with our close friends. I think a lot of that has to do with the possibility of appearing weak or flawed.

    XOXO👨🏼‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏽

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree.
      And I feel honored you're so open with me, babes. I did not believe you when you told me you're an introvert, because you're so REAL with me. But those two things can coexist, obvs.
      And I totally agree with that last statement.

      XOXO

      Delete
  5. I have a few really great friendships and, as I was often the one who moved away, learned who my true friends are ... the ones who stayed in contact, came to visit or invited us to visit them, called wrote, make even the smallest effort to stay in your life.
    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Same.
      I have seen some of those friends who moved away through the years and it's awesome. Even the smallest Bday wish or Holiday greeting is greatly appreciated, you're correct.

      XOXO

      Delete
  6. Your kinds words about have me blushing! I felt the same way about yourself. I had such a wonderful weekend with you.

    Over time, I have learned that there are true friends and then acquaintances. I'm still friend with my first ex, and two other friends when I came out...they'd do anything for me and vice versa. I have a very close-knit group of my inner sanctum that I call true friends that I trust and love. And then other pop up like you say . I think of you and Anne Marie as such and do consider you my true friends too. Odd how that can happen right? Which make it all the more special.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But babes, you're awesome!
      And I mean it. We need to repeat sometime this year!
      I also have a group of my 'unconditional' ones. It's a great feeling.
      Awww dear Anne Marie! And I feel honored you consider me a friend. *smooches*

      XOXO

      Delete
  7. Excellent video. I have a lot of acquaintances, some very good. But true friends? Rare.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That video spells it out quite fabulously, no?
      And I also have tons of acquaintances (and some have become real friends) and a group of true friends that have lasted twenty and more years!

      XOXO

      Delete
  8. I have so few friends... and it feels worse than it is, because when I was in theatre I had way too many friends... so at this point in my life I am feeling the vacuum / void not having those temporary families in my life. At the same time... I don't miss it. And, in hindsight many of those I counted as friends behaved in a way that made them anything but. So, I managed to keep some for many years... but now, there's really not any of those people in my life (in fact, many are dead!!). I count certain members of my family as friends. I have an ex I am very close to, and I have the BF. I keep making an effort to make more friends... like at the prairie - but so far those relationships have failed to leave that environment. Anyhoo. I don't miss it. I have more time for myself and have become very guarded about my time. So, while I think about dipping my toe back in those waters, I remind myself all that I would be sacrificing - and have thus far resisted the urge. That could change. I dunno. I am awful selfish. Kizzes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I feel you, Upton!
      I used to have tons of acquaintances and friends when I was in college and most of them have just moved away or I have lost contact with them. I am also close with (some of) my exes (you know how it is) and it's a great feeling.
      And you can share that time, Upton. Just find someone who would appreciate it as much as you do!

      XOXO

      Delete

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