crazy sexy

... and keeping with the conversation I was having with myself about race, this video (who popped up in my youtube suggestions, because of course) made me think again about that gap that we keep seeing everyday in culture: why cannot men who do not conform to the notion imposed by the mainstream media of 'sexy' be sexy? I call bullshit.

There are many, many men that society (and I think that the subset of gay men is even more prone to this)  basically emasculates just because they don't fulfill an European ideal of beauty that stinks of colonialism and racism. The whitewashing of desire needs to end. I, for example, am all for objectifying any man, as long as he is sexy. Of course, to be considered  'sexy' the object of our lust must be prized as such by society at large. Isn't that true? We covet what's coveted. And let's be honest, Asian men are not that coveted in gay circles. A cursory look at Tumblr or Blogger will tell you that: most men put up to be ogled are NOT Asian. Especially White,  and then Latin and Black men (to a lesser extent) are more objectified at a higher scale than Asian men by a big margin.

So when it comes to desire, Asian men are not perceived the same way that white men are. According to my very impressionistic scale, for what I've seen while roaming the interwebs looking  for hot 'inspiration' the pecking order is: White men, Latin men, Black men, Asian men. Latin and Black men are still markedly less 'promoted' in gay porn and considered more 'niche' than White men, but they still carry the idea of being considered somehow more of a sex object than Asian men. Is it because of the stereotype of Asian men being more passive? Of being somehow shorter/less bulkier? Of being less hung?

But if we look a little bit closer, we notice that most times this pecking order (no pun intended) is tied somehow to colonialism: men in parts of the world that have been colonized by Europeans (or have been in war with Western countries) tend to have a lower erotic value than well, White men. Don't believe me? Have you noticed that somehow men associated with countries where colonization has taken place do not place higher in the prestige of dick? Japanese men, Indian men, Korean men, Chinese men. Or men who have features that can be considered to be ethnically related to an Asian country colonized by Europeans, or somehow below European influence, rank low in the scale of desire.

Colonialism has taken place all over the globe. There have been protectorates and mandates and 'areas of influence' all over the world that have been influenced by a markedly European dominance. Not to mention that many of those countries are 'developing' countries and therefore do not have a marked influence on media, with the exception of India and the Bollywood machine. But still, Desi studs are relegated to their own realm and very few actually 'cross over' to be part of the collective desire reserved to actors who look more 'mainstream'. And in this case, we all know that mainstream is Caucasian.

So the men in the video are right when the say that Asian men are not considered sexy, especially in American media. Asian men in general have been generally portrayed as less masculine and therefore less desirable. Even when put in a position of being desired, like the current wave of K-Pop idols, there are still overwhelmingly eclipsed by their White counterparts. So what about if we try to objectify more men who are not conventionally European? What if we expand a little bit more our 'preference'? What if we post more men of color? There's a plethora of shades that can be lusted over, so let's try and show them more. And because we always should start with the man in the mirror, I think I will.



  1. I, for one, find men of all stripes sexy. I think it has to do with the way a man projects himself. Confidence and knowing what you want is hella sexy. (Sound like anyone we know?) Extra points if they are the pursuer. I go through bouts in my selection of porn where I'll search for Asian, Latin or Black men.

    Now, does this mean that I fetishize them? I sure as hell hope not, because that is never my intent. I just have a high desire for a wide variety of men (eye candy?).

    So yeah, bring them all on, I'm game!

    XOXO 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

  2. I agree with the above comment. I have enjoy the "muscle white jock" and they are sexy and fun, but I have enjoyed some pretty hot sex with Asians. But my weakness for men really comes into play with Argentinians and Brazilians. I'm putty in your hands, mold me...…………...


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