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Mermania



OMG this looks like so much FUN! And I wanna do it. Mind you, I still dream of one day doing what Maddie did in Europe, but meanwhile... here's this idea: Mermaning. Right. Of course that's not a word but bear with me.  This looks like seven tons of fun. I have to confess that the idea of being a merman is a pretty cool one: you get to live underwater and your movements are going to be super graceful and you get to talk to little fish.



Besides, I really like Tran France (one of the Queer Eye guys, if you didn't know) and I find him very charismatic and stylish. After all, he's the sartorialist of the group. He's become quite the personality online and his videos are super cool and entertaining. He brings his unique British sensibility to things we consider mundane in America (not like strapping on a merman's tail is mundane, but yo know what I mean) and as a gay man of color, he creates some sorely needed intersectionality. In this video he hangs out with one of his girlfriends and goes to a place where they teach you how to ... Merman? And they provide the tail! I was not very keen of the manta rays in the tank, but hey, I'll take them as long as I get to fulfill a fantasy I've had since I was eight and I played with my sister's toy mermaid.

Oh, yeah. I used to play with one of my sister's toys. It was this mermaid with red hair and ruby lips that apparently could swim. I paired her with my toy soldiers and action figures and she always rescued them. I remember my grandma would come and get me in the backyard because it was dinnertime and had to convince me to let the toys be for awhile and go eat. I would create these elaborate scenarios where all the guys would have to go to the bottom of the kiddie pool because their boat had sunk and the mermaid would rescue them. Of course, she was rescuing them but G.I. Joe would always end up with Ken in an island. But that's another story.


Anyways, back to Tran France's video and mermen. You know I'm all for shattering gender expectations and it IS expected that if you are going to be an imaginary being who is half fish and half human you ARE going to be female. And white. AMIRIGHT? Yeah, there was a huge stink of twitter (where else?) when it was announced that the actress chosen to be Ariel, in The Little Mermaid live action remake was going to be... black? Because white fragility is a thing, people went around throwing ash on their hair and screaming SHAME! because a fictional character was not going to comply to their White Nationalist fantasies.

So yes, for Tran and his fish tail. I know I won't be in the Las Vegas vicinity any time soon so Lake Michigan will have to do.

Also, this is not the first time a guy wants to be a merman, and I'm here for it.







Comments

  1. Oh, it's a thing...like gay unicorns farting rainbows and the like. But if we're going to go white merman nationalist, let's not forget those tasty morsels of sushi in La Madonna's video "Cherish." Now there's some tasty bit of seafood I wouldn't mind playing Marco Polo with. I'm just sayin'

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8q2WS6ahCnY

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  2. Ok I AM currently in Las Vegas for business and everything is very structured so I won’t be able to enjoy this. Plus the fact I don’t swim is a factor. But if you were here I’d be all for you doing this. It looks like so much fun. And don’t forget Jazz Jennings (I am Jazz) who also has made tails in the past for little transgender kids.

    XOXO 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

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  3. First "they" took Santa, now the little mermaid, what's next!!! Well as a white boy, after they made a Michael Jackson movie using a white actor (cringe) I'm staying quiet!
    Now as for you, I hope you are a good swimmer! That's really mixed up, I'm starting to really worry about you! No just kidding :D if you do the merman thing, I want to see a picture. G.I.Joe was dirty, when he wasn't with Ken, you should have seen what he was doing with the six million dollar man at my place! Anyway I'm off to buy a really really big fishing net!

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  4. Follow your dream! I bet you'd be a great merman!

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  5. Well if I could swim I would love this too!!!! I dont know you saw my post some time ago, but a co worker of mine designed mermaid tails as he is a costume designer, and made a calendar of Mermen, which sold out and proceeds went to a LGBT charity. He is set to dox another this summer and possibly a drag queen version of mermaids. I love mormons, but they have no cock to suck!!!!!!!!

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  6. Mormons???? Damn spell check. Mermen is should have said.

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  7. @maddie - you were correct the first time.

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  8. I'm with Maddie. No dick!

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  9. I like the idea of mermen. I'm thinking hooking one might be fun. And I don't think Maddie really knows the meaning of 'dox.'


    dox
    /däks/
    verbINFORMAL
    search for and publish private or identifying information about (a particular individual) on the Internet, typically with malicious intent.

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  10. Let's face it, Maddie will take any tail!!!

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  11. Oh Maddie you just made my day, I was cracking up here, actually there is a whole series of gay adult movies about repressed Mormons stripping down and getting down if you know what I mean! That makes me think it was a Freudian slip on your part Maddie! Lol

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  12. Steven, te hat is actually a fantasy of mine to have two mormons knock at my door at a bad time, let them in and make them uncomfortable with my high sleep shorts and no shirt look. All goes well, till my cock starts shaking out the short opening....we then know where this leads.......

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